Table Time

I have slept better the past two nights than I have in at least 8 months. Monday night Declan slept from 8:30 - 1am, and 2:15am - 8am (with periodic crying but no getting out of bed for me) and last night he did 8 - 11:30, and 12:15 - 7:30am (again with periodic crying, but I don't really know how much or how long because it was never long enough for me to fully wake up and get out of bed to pat him back down.) I'm seriously a new woman. And I'm not sure if the boys are having a contest to be "the best kid in the world" or if it's that I'm so much more well rested. Probably both. Declan cut his second tooth so I think he's in a better mood because the teething pain has subsided.

So with my marriage to Javier I acquired two tables - a dining room table and a humongus coffee table. At the end of the day when we're all at our wits ends, the boys and I crawl around on the dining room floor under the table, chasing each other in circles. It's the best because Declan laughs so hard that he gets out of breath, he loves trying to keep up with us and guess where we'll pop up next shouting "boo!". The coffee table was my nemesis for the longest time because it's just so huge that it didn't fit in with the living room that I wanted to create... but two years later I will confess that it is the best table ever for little kids. It's the perfect height for Declan to pull himself up on, and since it's so large it's perfect for cruising. For Jack it's the perfect height for puzzles, coloring, and his latest passion, cars, trains and buses. We go in circles around the table with what ever vehicle we have shouting "vrooom!" or "chugga chugga choo choo!". I used to be excited to get rid of the table, but now I think it will be sad when it goes. Maybe.

Zen Moments

Today was just one of those wonderful days. It started with waking up at 8 am. SAY IT WITH ME: 8 AM!!! Hooray! Last night we official began "Ferberizing" Declan - essentially letting him figure out how to fall asleep on his own (with crying) - but oh so necessary because the night before he was in bed with us, awake every 2 hours. So he fell asleep last night at 8:30 with only two minutes of crying, he woke up at 1 am, crying on and off for about an hour. When his crying tone changed, I did give him Tylenol and a bottle (poor baby is teething) and he slept again from about 2:30 til 8. Again: Hooray! Tonight Declan fell asleep by 8, again, going to sleep on his own.

And another wonderful thing happened: last night was the first night that Declan was calm while I diapered and dressed him after his bath. Usually he's squirming and screaming, but last night he was cheerful and calm throughout the whole process. I wondered if this day would ever come, or if bedtime would always be a struggle. It felt great. Tonight at bedtime was almost as wonderful (just a big of squirming and whining as I put him in his sleep sack) and again, he went right to bed on his own. Still sleeping 1 hour and 15 minutes later. Fabulous, fabulous, fabulous.

Both boys were darlings today. I'm sure the fact that I was able to sleep 5 hours in a row helped, but really, these boys are awesome. We played trains on our rediculously huge coffee table, which I used to despise but it's the best coffee table ever for puzzles, trains, coloring, and learning to walk, so I'm learning to love the table. I love that Jack is getting into trains - he can go around a table over and over pushing his train (or car or truck or bus of whatever with wheels.)

I had such a wonderful moment today when both boys went down for their afternoon naps and I was able to putter around the house and prepare a nice dinner. In the afternoon Sophie MacMillan came over to play with Jack - he just loves Sophie and that makes me so happy. When he saw her he pulled away from my arms and held his arms up to her - and when she put him down he just hug her legs. I love that he loves her - makes me thrilled for our future babysitting prospects! Irene came over with Conner and Jake for our playdate, which basically consisted of Jake sleeping, Declan crawling around with his paci, Jack and Conner playing independently, and Irene and I gossiping and trying to figure out feeding and sleep schedules.

Then tonight, after bathing both boys together, which is hilarious, and putting both boys down, which was surprisingly easy and calm, Javier and I were able to enjoy the dinner I made this afternoon - short ribs and tagliatelle - so yummy. I feel like we're moving out of the tricky infant stage and into a manageable, routine stage which is awesome. Happy days.

One last thing - yesterday I took the boys to get their pictures taken with Santa - Jack freaked. So I'm in the picture holding Jack while Declan sits on Santa's lap. Lesson learned: next year I should shower and look presentable for Santa Day in case I need to get in the picture, or I just throw crying kids in Santa's lap and take the first shot, crying kids and all. I kind of wish I threw Jack into Santa's lap, but it's all good. I'll always have the memory of Jack sitting on my lap, Santa's arm around me, while I laughed and tried to keep Jack from sticking his finger in his ear.

Live, From Boston...

It's been milestone-city in the Vargas household. No, we haven't hit the all important sleeping through the night yet, but I have next weekend tagged as a Ferberizing weekend for Mr. Declan. But our other milestones are really just as exciting:

- Declan is a crawling maniac, and has started to pull himself up into a standing position.
- Jack counted to nine - he can't say "f" sounds yet, he substitutes the "s", so it's "three, soor, sive, six, se-ten, eight, niii." (He also eats with a sork and the srog says ribb-it!)
- Declan's first tooth popped out today! (Maybe it was happening last night when he wouldn't go back to sleep?) We can see his gums and yo can see his two bottom teeth through the gums.
- Declan has become a pacifier junkie. After months of trying to get him to take it, he finally decides he loves the pacifier, at the age when I would ideally like to wean him from the paci. Sigh.

We're in Holbrook, MA right now staying at Billy and Cassie's new house - it's so exciting to see their beautiful new home and to have the space for the boys to sleep and play (and a separate place for us to hang out while the boys are napping...) Yesterday we had Thanksgiving dinner at Danny and Alma's house - a huge 22 lb turkey. It was the first year we had a legitimate "kid's table" - Jack was stealing cranberry sauce from Joe and Maddie's plates while chaos reigned.

I've been really proud of both boys and how good they've been this whole trip. They were great in the car ride up here, and they've been maintaining good spirits while we take them to new places with new crowds of people. Jack has maintained a good sleep schedule and has been going down without any fuss which makes me so happy. (I seriously never knew that sleep schedules would be so important to me as a parent, but it seems to be my thing. I guess it's because the better the boys sleep, the happier they are, the happier we are free to be.) On Wednesday we went to the aquarium with Billy and then had a great lunch at Legal Seafoods - Jack had a full bowl of chowder and was so well behaved - Declan was in our arms and happy as can be.

A Zeh-bra With a Double Ear Infection (With a side of great news)

So Halloween was a bust this year, although we still managed to be the House of Horrors. On Friday morning I decided to take Jack to Dr. Cambria because his cough did not seem to be getting any better. As soon as she heard him cough she said it was in his chest and that we'd give him antibiotics, and then she looked in his ear and said "And that ear is infected" and I thought I heard her wrong. How could this be? No fever, no ear tugging, how's a mom to know?!? And then she looked in his other ear and said "And this ear is infected too". ARGH!!!

(Sidenote: since this was a last minute visit, I had both boys on my own, for the most part they were spectacular - there was one point where they were both wailing, but Dr. Cambria took Declan (bless her! BEST pediatrician ever!) and I had Jack, reciting Brown Bear over and over....)

So Jack never got to bust out the zebra costume (zeh-bra!) but fortunately our playgroup is having our halloween celebration this Friday since everyone was sick. Back to our house of horrors - then Friday night I had fever and chills - went to the doctor on Saturday (Summit Medical Group - on call doctors on weekends - love them!) and I have mastitis and an ear infection. (Where are these ear infections coming from and how come I NEVER know about them?!?) So I'm on antibiotics too...

BUT... DRUMROLL PLEASE! Declan slept through the night last night! I'm talking from 9:30pm to 7:30am - straight!!! 10 hours - hooray! Yay yay yay! The night before he went from 8:30 - 4 and I was happy with that, but never expected something so wonderful! I'm hopeful for tonight, but never plan on anything. For future reference I think the following things help: (1) we put a humidifier in the room, we should have done that ages ago, even if it didn't make a difference; (2) I've been better about saline drops up the nose; (3) Declan gets a bottle of half formula, half breastmilk before bed; (4) General rule of thumb: 5 minutes of crying, visit and soothe, 5 minutes of crying; (5) No feeding if it's been less than 6 hours since his bedtime feeding (if possible).

This morning we went to the Turtleback zoo - Declan pretty much slept through the whole thing. It was cool because Jack actually took notice of the animals and he was smiling and enthralled. When we saw a brightly colored pheasant from China and were oooohing and aaahing over him, Jack copied us and said "wooooow". It was awesome. Overall, Jack is a little ape - copies everything we do. This past week he was helping rake leaves and put them in the barrel - he uses a small rake, but then he wanted to put on the gardening gloves and and it was the cutest thing to see him acting so grown up - afterward we came in from the chilly fall day and we made Jack's first hot chocolate. (sorry Declan - you were sleeping again - but we love you and you are the cutest baby ever!)

Declan's milestones: Sitting up on his own (will attach video) and he's crawling like crazy. I think it's going to be challenging because he crawls up to Jack and tries to play with whatever toy Jack is using. So far Jack has tolerated it pretty well, but I predict trouble in the near future. Javier says we're going to have to buy two of everything, but I say they will just have to learn to share sooner rather than later. (Why do I think we'll have two of everything?!?!)

Crawling and Sleeping and Talking, oh my!

I was just about to write that the boys are flourishing, when Jack just had a coughing/gagging fit, which reminded me that the first winter cold has hit our household. We're all surviving it with minimal hoopla, although Javier did have to take a day off last week because he felt so lousy. Poor Jack has had it the longest, but at least his nose has stopped running like a faucet.

Time seems to be moving more quickly... Declan turned 6 months last week. He's changing like crazy, although you'd never know if by looking at him, since he is still a baldy. But his latest and most exciting update - he's pretty much crawling! I say pretty much because it's more of an army crawl - he moves on his forearms and knees. It's fun to see him crawl after what he wants - it's that first insight into what he's thinking and interested in. Declan will often go after some of Jack's toys, and Jack looks wary, but then Jack will move on without making much of a fuss.

We've had some improvements on the sleep front, although last night was a relapse. On a positive note, Declan can fall asleep on his own, with minimal crying and fuss. Our general rule is two five-minute sessions of crying before we intervene with a rocking or feeding. For a long time, Declan was getting up two times a night, waking up after 4 hours of sleep and 3 hours of sleep. Then three nights ago he woke up at midnight (4 hours) but put himself down to sleep for another 3.5 hours - so he went 7 1/2 hours! YAY! This is big. So I did feed him at around 4 am, but I can live with that. The following night it was similar, but then last night Javier and I caved a bit with the crying. Big mistake. Tonight Declan will be putting himself back to sleep!

Declan also had his 6 month Dr. appt on Monday - he's 18 lbs, 12 oz (75th percentile) and is 26.75 inches long (60th percentile). He had his vaccinations which is always sad, but he recovered about two seconds after the shots were given. I feel good about him getting vaccinations - it makes me crazy when other people don't get their children vaccinated and put my children at risk.

As for the Jack-Attack... he's good. He runs circles around the downstairs and chats up a storm. His vocabulary is growing, but only when he's in the mood to talk and he likes the topic, which means if it's about Dora, The Backyardigans, or an animal, he's likely interested. His favorite word for awhile was zebra (zah-brah) but he also says giraffe (jeh-aff) and bear (beh-r) and a bunch of others. He can also do his colors and has mastered red (reh!) blue (boo!) green (gnnn!) and orange (or-ahge) - I use the exlamation points because he's usually screaming at the name of the color and then clapping like crazy for himself. No exclamation point after orange because he always says that one softly.

Our Fall Weekend

Ahhhh, Tuesday morning and we're enjoying our new basement. I love that the boys can play with their toys and I can be on the computer and keep my eye on them at the same time. (Of course as I just turned around to check on them, Jack was taking all the baby wipes out of the box and Declan has a (clean) diaper in his mouth.)

We're taking it easy this week - Jack has a cold and I'm guessing a sore throat and aches from the way he just bursts out with an unhappy sound every now and then. Yesterday I made a huge pot of chicken soup (thank you Alma!) and I've just been pumping him full of chicken soup and orange juice. His nose had two streams of snot coming down (where are those baby wipes?) because it's hard to get him to blow his nose, so it's always running.

We had a really relaxing weekend. We took a tour of NJ to see some new sights and take in the fall foliage - a little early, but it was still a beautiful drive. Let me just say, these things are fun, but you forget how tricky it can get with kids. We drove west to a winery by the Delaware River - the Alba Vineyards - it was in a gorgeous part of the state and we got to see how realistic it is to run a small winery, and Jack got to run around among the vines - but unfortunately we didn't get to do a tour or tasting because Jack's patience was limited. Declan was content as can be in the Baby Bjorn taking in the sights and laughing when Jack would run around like a madman.

After that, we drove down a small road next to the Delaware River (so small that it was one lane, despite two-way traffic which was nerve wracking) to a small town called Milford. Really cute town, but Jack was getting hungry and antsy from being in the car (Declan was sleeping, bless him) so we got lunch and directions to a park. Unfortunately when we got to the park, there was a bright red sign that announced a high risk for lyme disease with two big ticks on it, and directions to check your body for ticks when leaving. Boo. So we skipped that park and continued our drive to Lambertville.

Our hope was that Jack would sleep in the car, but no. So in Lambertville we went to a park for awhile, fed Declan, and drove around the town. Javier and I will have to go some day when we can leave the boys with mom and dad (sorry boys!) so we can walk around the cute town and art galleries, and walk over the bridge into New Hope PA. We went on to East Windsor and that night Javier and I went to dinner - the first time out to dinner since Declan was born! - and we had a wonderful time, great dinner, and a bottle of wine from the Alba Vineyard... it was a glimpse into what life will be like again someday when the boys are a bit older. But it also makes it easier to look at the boys and appreciate where they are and savor this time while they're little.

And to be filed under "Cutest Thing Ever"...

(Video clip of Jack's ready, set, go in Jersey City)

A couple of days ago I had to take the boys to the mall to do a quick errand - Jack is very happy to go because he gets to run around like a mad man. He does his version of "ready, set, go" only it's deep squat, "sssss", "GOOOO" and he's off and running. But that's not the cutest thing ever.

No, the cutest thing ever is when he was running by Abercrombie and Fitch, which was blaring out music. Jack screeched to a halt when he heard the music and started dancing. And dancing only the way Jack can dance, with his little bounce and his arms going up and down, and his little fingers wiggling as he pretends to snap his fingers, all while turning in circles. Jack just danced for about 5 minutes while the shoppers maneuvered around him, and Jack smiling up at them like the Mayor of the Short Hills Mall. Yes, that was the cutest thing ever.

Reclaiming the night!

Pictures: Jack feeding the goats and discovering mud puddles at Windsor Farms. Declan holding up his head. Jack and Declan in the green car at Memorial Field Park.

So it's 9pm, both boys have been sleeping for one hour. I'll be in bed soon and plan on getting at least some sleep before Declan wakes up. (Hopefully. Hopefully, hopefully, hopefully.) I'm so excited to have a bit of down time before crashing into bed. I really feel like this is such a big step in reclaiming life after the itty bitty infant stage.

This great change has happened right after a few nights of the worst sleep ever - Declan was up every 1.5 hours and would need to nurse to get back to sleep. I figured that he was waking up at the end of each sleep cycle and had no way to get himself back to sleep without help, so I knew we had to let him figure out how to do it on his own (aka, protest and cry). On Monday's nap (at mom and dad's) I resolved to let him cry for two 5 minute segments, and then do whatever it would take to help him sleep. He fell asleep in the second 5 minute interval and I felt like a new person. Thanks to mom and Mrs. Kulina for keeping me company during it all. So now we're easing into the "Ferberizing" stage, and so far Declan hasn't really cried for more than 10 minutes without being able to go to sleep, sometimes with some patting and back rubs, but no rocking or nursing. Say it with me: Yay! Last night he slept 9 - 12:30, 12:30 - 1:45, 1:45 - 5:45, and 5:45 - 8am. That was our best night in a long time and I feel like we're getting close to even longer stretches.

I'm pretty sure Declan is teething - he's gnawing on everything he can get his hands on. And he can get his hands on quite a bit because he's semi-mobile. He can shimmy on his belly to get to something he wants - he's a very determined little baby. I see him getting up on his hands and knees more and more often. He continues to be a very smilely guy.

As for Jack - he's so cute with Declan. When he finds one of Declan's toys on the floor (and let's face it, they're always on the floor) he brings it over to Declan and holds it out to him saying "Sssss." (Jackenese for "share"). For the most part Jack doesn't take much notice of Declan, although he is very careful not to step on him or fall on him when he's tearing around the house.

I've been staying busy these past couple of weeks - trying to get out walking with the boys every day - I love the fall. My best days are when I walk downtown to the Y, drop the boys at babysitting and have a workout, and then walk home. We have play group almost every Friday, and last Friday I was finally able to host now that we have the basement finished. The picture of the group of kids on the stairs is from last Friday - Jack's not in the picture because he was holding my leg, crying to be picked up. Sigh.

Off to relax a bit more before bed....

Stalled in the Tunnel / Jack Houdini

For a long time now I've been saying that Declan's sleeping is going to get better, that we're getting close, that I see a light at the end of the tunnel. Well, I still see the light at the end of the tunnel, but we're not getting any closer to it - we're stalled. Oddly enough, I'm ok with it in the short run - helped by the fact that Declan is so adorable and lovey during the day. In the middle of the night (at approximately 12 am, 2:30 am, and 5 am) I'm still cursing and complaining, but I know that someday - someday - I will sleep again.

As for our Houdini.... he was up for awhile playing in his crib... or so we thought. Javier went up to take Jack out of his crib, stopped at the door because he couldn't believe how much noise Jack was making in his crib, went in and discovered Jack on the floor by his toy box, taking out all of his toys. Foiled!!! I'm actually relieved that Jack was able to crawl out well enough - and safely enough - that we didn't even hear him (we did have the montor on). We have no idea how he did it, but Jack did it without a crash, without a cry - nada. Later we're going to take him up and put him in his crib to see if he'll crawl out in front of us. Overall we think it's pretty hilarious.

The Cave People and Puppies

Declan had his 4 month check up today - 4 months!! He's 26.25 inches long and weighs 17 lbs even, 90th percentile for both. I love these check ups... for me, it's almost like a job review, and even though I know being a stay at home mom is an important job and one of the hardest, it's nice to have it validated sometimes by an objective reviewer. Hearing from Dr. Cambria that the boys are thriving and wonderful reminds me that despite the frustrations and lack of brain stimulation that come with the role, that I'm doing an important job and doing it well.

As I write this, Declan is sleeping in our bed, on his side, in the sleep positioner. Five minutes after he went down to sleep (enough time for me to get downstairs and start to unwind) he woke up crying. So I went back upstairs, lay down next to him, and he grabbed for my face with both hands, getting a hold of my nose and my ear. Once he realized he was cuddled up next to me, he settled right down and went back to sleep. And I thought to myself: this is how the cave people must have done it.

See, Javier and I are constantly marveling at the challenges of caring for babies, and when the going gets tough, we say "how on earth did the cave people manage this?" While I lay there tonight with Declan, who was content as could be snuggled into me, I could imagine us as a mom and her baby tens of thousands ago in a cave on our bearskin rug... the Mama Cave Women probably just had their babies cuddled next to them all the time - more like we see animals today. Which then got me thinking... this is how puppies sleep too - all cuddled up to the mother. Anyways, somehow it made it all easier to think of it in these terms, and realize that Declan is just a little baby who needs snuggling and warmth to feel secure, and that it's just such a basic need... no matter the species or the time period.

Now, that sounds all very new age-y to me... a bit too crunchy and holistic, so major disclaimer here: I am so not a proponent of the family bed. (This is so personal and I totally respect people who choose to do it, it's just not for me in the long term.) Because as I lay there thinking about the cave people and puppies, I also realized that the cave people most likely had a much higher infant mortality rate and I have yet to read about a puppy expiring of SIDS. So the practical side of me still can't wait until Declan's sleeping on his own. As my dad likes to say, "snip, snip, snip!"

"So this is our problem"

First something that has nothing to do with the boys: I was just on a mom's website (there are literally zillions of them) and I saw a post from a woman writing about her son in high school. She used "kinda" at least two times - maybe more, but I stopped reading at the second "kinda" - please, if you're reading this (which means mom, Gladys, Gisela, or Gaby) and I use "kinda" feel free to yell at me.

OK... so the boys - that's why you're here, right? Jack's latest is that he had his 18 month check up last Wednesday (Declan's is tomorrow, but I already know what Dr. Cambria is going to say - he's a giant, and too bad he doesn't sleep well) - oh, but back to Jack - Jack is 33 inches in length, 70th percentile, and 24 lbs 4 oz, 25th percentile. He's a long, lean kid. For this visit I was really feeling the pressure for Jack to have some words since he wasn't knocking our socks off at the 15 month check up. The conversation went something like this:

DR. CAMBRIA: Does Jack have any words?
ME: Yeah... he says things like "ball"
JACK: Baw!
ME: ... and "up"
JACK: Ub!
ME: ... and he can say dog, and cat, and he knows all his animal sounds.
DR. CAMBRIA: What does the duck say?
JACK: woof woof!
ME: (sheepish grin) Duck, honey, not "dog"
DR. CAMBRIA: What does the cow say?
JACK: eee-ow!
ME (almost panicking): Ha, ha, Cow, honey, not "cat"

Jack redeemed himself when he got this Dora the Explorer sticker. "DOW-WA!"

Declan can do lots of things:
- blow raspberries so forcefully that milky slime ends up on top of his head
- hold onto a rattle and put it in his mouth
- sit in the bumbo
- jump in the jumper
- almost sit up on his own - like, really on his own, no support

Declan can't:
- sleep for long periods of time.

So this is our problem: Declan likes to roll over onto his tummy in his sleep, but he doesn't turn his head to the side to clear his airway. Instead, he pushes his nose straight down onto the mattress and puts his arms up along his head to block out any fresh air. This pushes all sorts of SIDS panic buttons throughout my body that I didn't even know I had until about a week ago. (Which would be right about the time I received my Parenting magazine that had an absolutely heartbreaking - and terrifying - article about SIDS) We've tried sleep positioners to stop him from rolling over, but when Declan tries to roll over and can't, he wakes up and cries (every hour or so). Our temporary solution, with the blessing of Dr. Cambria: Declan is in bed with us, sometimes in the positioner and sometimes not, but Javier and I are aware of his head position throughout the night. (Translation: neither of us are sleeping very well...) - our goal is to "train" Declan to turn his head when he rolls onto his stomach. So far, Declan has proved remarkably resistant to changing his favorite sleeping position.

With that said, I should be off to bed while the boy is sleeping...

To all the family in Chicago: We'll see you soon!

Siiiiinging in the Rain

Ok, so I thought the cutest thing ever was watching Jack discover a mud puddle last week. Until I saw him discover the fun of running around in his diaper during a summer rain storm. Jack, who had woken up from his nap in a bad mood and was inconsolable, was running around in the rain in sheer glee, laughing, so thrilled he was going in circles and back and forth - probably close to the happiest I've seen him, and I've seen this kid pretty happy.

So the memory is doubly sweet, first because nothing makes me so happy as to see one of my children laughing, but also because my mom took him out in the rain when she saw that I wanted to allow Jack to explore the rain, but didn't want to get wet myself. Now that I'm a mother I realize that she did this for two reasons: ( 1) she loves Jack and (2) she loves me. The "nothing makes me so happy as to see one of my children laughing" is a wonderful chain - she got to see Jack happy, but she also got to see me happy as I sat there - dry - grinning while I watched Jack run and laugh. Thanks Mom.

Declan, for his part, has been dubbed "the best baby ever" "giant baby" "baby giant" and "duck-lin" (by cousin Maddie - "where's duck-lin? where's duck-lin?") We're still see-sawing with the sleep, but I focus on the positive - at least he knows night time and day time (even if he wakes up a lot at night, he goes back to sleep) and he now goes down around 9 / 9:30. Declan took his first bottle of 100% formula (4 oz) which is a big milestone and a huge relief for me - he seemed to like it, which is a good thing since we'll be mixing it with cereal in just a few months. Yay!

Getting out with the Vibe!

So for the past two days, the Vibe stroller has been the best thing ever. Yesterday morning was stormy, but I was able to take the boys to the mall to get some errands done, and they were both happy. In the afternoon I was going to let Jack run around in Borders before we did the grocery shopping, but every time I tried to hold his hand because it was a safety issue or because he was going to wreak havoc, he would collapse to the ground and refuse to cooperate. (he does this thing where he just falls and swings around my body because I'm still holding his hand... I just hope his arm stays in the socket.) Solved the problem by leaving and going to the grocery store where he was a peach in the shopping cart. Declan was just hanging out in the Bjorn this whole time.

But this morning was the best accomplishment - loaded the boys up in the stroller and we walked downtown to the gym - it was a beautiful crisp morning and I was so happy to get out early. Once we got to the Y, it was great to see all of the babysitters there, and they were thrilled to see Jack again and meet Declan. I always make sure that I hang out for awhile in the beginning to make sure Jack is acclimated, and also to hang out with the babysitters and chat in Spanish, which I think translates into more attentive care for the boys when I'm not there. I feel like I got a great workout with the walk there and back, and I got a lot of stretching in at the gym since I've been having a lot of neck and wrist pain - casualties from taking care of two small kids, I think. I'm so excited to be back on the gym / babysitting bandwagon again!

It's my potty and I'll cry if I want to...

OK, so I should be sleeping but I'm addicted to the Olympics. So a quick catch up...

Potty reference in title - we bought Jack a kiddie potty awhile ago because he's fascinated when we go to the bathroom, so Javier decided that since Jack is interested, why not let him have his own toilet? I have no problem with this, and of course would be thrilled if Jack potty trained early, I just want to manage expectations here... the average age for boys to potty train is 3+ years... Jack isn't even 1 1/2 yet (and let's be honest, has been at the tail end of the milestone time frames). BUT! Last night Jack peed in his potty. Coincidence? Very likely (I mean, he can't even communicate when he needs to go...) but hey - still a milestone, still very exciting! Go Jack go. (Literally, go Jack go. In the potty.)

Declan is starting to fall into some sort of sleep routines and habits, though he's still not consistently a good sleeper. We seem to have 2 or 3 good nights followed by 2 or 3 not so good nights. But at least now we have a going down routine - into the bath around 9:15 or so (loves his baths), lotion/massage, pjs on and nursing in a darkened room, and he either falls asleep nursing or in his bed being patted and shushed. I like that he can fall asleep being shhhh'd because I feel this is a step closer to him falling asleep on his own. He's usually asleep by 9:45, but then it's anyone's guess how long he'll stay asleep for.

We've been on and off busy. Thursday I took the boys up to see Christina and John at Mrs. Morgner's country house - we played with Jack in the lake which was lovely and Declan continues to make friends with his big toothless grin and happy nature. Declan and John are good buddies now. Jack was a prince in the car ride up - with the help of a chocolate chip cookie bribe - and napped for a good portion of the way home (thank goodness!) and Declan slept both ways, a huge stress reliever.

Friday we went down to East Windsor and the Boston cousins were still there so Jack and Declan had a nice visit with them. Rosie, Alma's mom, had Declan the whole time and Declan just loved her, laughing away. Jack and Maddie play really nicely together, no stealing, hitting, or anything like that. And Jack just looks up to Joey like "holy cow, what's this kid going to do next?" I was also able to pick up the tile for the bathroom and laundry area in the basement (yay!) since the flooring will be going down this week.

Saturday afternoon we took the boys to the pool and Jack is very brave in the water - he'll duck his head under the running water in the baby pool, and he's not afraid to float on his back and get his ears wet. He hasn't mastered blowing bubbles yet, but I think that's around the corner. I'll post shots of Declan - we put his toes in the pool and it was the first time he was sporting his bathing suit.

Lemonade out of Lemons

Things have been going really well. Right now I'm feeling very relaxed and happy - both boys are sleeping and we've had a great and productive day. This morning I took the boys downtown to run some errands - we got the invitations to Declan's baptism, I bought a hostess gift for Christina's mom (we're going to her country house tomorrow in NY), and sent out a baby gift and card from UPS. I ran into Leslie Arlein and her boys and caught up with her as well. The last time I saw her was in Kings when I told her I was pregnant with Declan - somewhere at 13 weeks, I guess.

After the errands we went to the park since Declan was asleep in the stroller and Jack had a good time running around. I manage it by pushing the stroller along the jungle gym, standing below any high openings that Jack might try to crawl down. This way I'm with both boys at all times. Thank goodness the Phil & Ted's stroller can handle the mulchy playground. In fact, I received several comments today on it being the latest model, and people asking me if I like it. I love it.

At home I fixed Jack his lunch (grilled cheese w/ tomato, side of blueberries), fed Declan, Jack watched his Backyardigans episode, and then down for the nap. The contractor came by today so I could finalize the flooring that's going into the basement, and that's going to be installed early next week. I'm so excited for the basement - next week is the flooring, tiling and trim. Then it will be ready for paint.

Declan has had two good nights of sleeping in a row - (6 hours last night, 5 hours the night before) - before that, we were going through a few rough nights of waking every couple of hours. He was up early Sunday morning and woke up Jack (the "lemons" part of this story) but we made the best of it and threw the boys in the stroller for an early walk downtown (the lemonade!) - we had a great walk and it was cool enough to need long sleeves, which I love - and then stopped at the diner to get breakfast to go. We took our breakfast to the park and had a picnic, and then Jack was able to run around while we had coffee. It was perfect. And then we had a nice walk home. Such a nice way to start the day.

And to be filed under "I heard this happens but never thought it would happen to us" category: Last week I was on the phone with Javier, and when I hung up Jack was standing in his pack-n-play with no diaper, just a T-shirt. Jack had thrown the diaper over the edge and onto the carpet. After checking out the situation, the diaper was only wet, I didn't smell anything foul, didn't see anything foul, Jack was clean, so I thought we were safe. Yes, thought. It wasn't until later, after I put Jack in the pack-n-play while the contractors stopped by that I was like, "Jack, are you dirty?" Nope, nothing in the diaper. And then I looked and saw poop in the pack-n-play and it had previously been covered by his dog book. (Which was thrown out and has since been replaced.) Totally gross. I had to wash all of the toys and scrub down the pack-n-play, in disbelief that it is my job to take care of these things while the boys blissfully float through life. Sigh. But I still think it's kind of funny.

Declan slept for 8 hours straight last night!!!

Need I say more?!?

I'm ecstatic. I know that this is not necessarily a trend, and rough nights lie ahead, but mentally I feel like we've hit a major milestone. It was probably the first time I've slept > 7 hours straight in at least 5 months, because even at the end of my pregnancy I wasn't getting that kind of sleep straight. Awesome.

Today we went to East Windsor to see Nana and Grandpa... it was just one of those days when I looked at the boys this morning and was like "what are we going to do all day?"... so away we went. Jack was happy to see Rosie - he kept communicating with her - "euf. euf. euf." After his nap we took the boys to Lee's Turkey Farm, and after buying fresh veggies for dinner, we took Jack to the attached playground while Declan slept. We didn't get home until late tonight because I had so much laundry to catch up on at mom and dad's - it's been a pain to do laundry here in the house while the basement is being refinished. The basement is looking good - sheetrocking is pretty much done, and doors and trim will be going in tomorrow and Saturday.

Flipper and Barker

So Declan is the flipper - today he kept rolling from his back to his stomach. It's such an amazing discovery and a huge milestone. Flipper's in the bath right now with Daddy, and I can hear him laughing. I love it. I'm superstitious - for the past two nights we did a bath time routine, and for the past two nights he's slept > 6 hours in the first stretch. So bath time it is. "Flipper" is also an appropriate name for him because he loves the water - like Flipper the Dolphin - does anyone else remember that show? I used to like staying home sick from school so I could watch Flipper.

Jack is the barker because he has additionally added "woof" to his vocabulary! (pronounced "euf" or sometimes just a quiet "fffff") So he'll say "daw... euf! He's learning because he has this animal puzzle that makes sounds, and we do the animals every day. He can even put away some of the puzzle pieces which blows my mind.

Two other cute things that Jack did today: First, while I was holding Declan, Jack came over and gave Declan a hug and a kiss. This made me so happy because it shows me that Jack realizes that hugs and kisses are a way of showing love and affection, and that all the hugs and kisses I've given him have sunken in. Second, while I was talking on the phone this morning, I was pacing around the coffee table. I looked up and Jack had the TV remote to his ear, head tilted to the right, jabbering away, waving his left hand, and walking around the coffee table. Hilarious.

One Trick Pony

It's Monday morning and I'm able to write for two reasons: (1) Declan slept well last night - yay! and (2) Javier has the day off from work - yay!

Each of the boys is in a very different stage (obviously) so my focus for each is so different - with Declan it's still trying to get through some of the newborn stages like eating and sleeping. Saturday night was really really hard - Declan was up probably every two hours for the first half of the night and maybe every hour and a half for the second half of the night. And when he was awake, he was unhappy - crying at the top of his lungs unhappy. How this doesn't wake up Jack, I don't know, but thank goodness for that. We tried everything (rocking and feeding, letting him in our bed, walking around the bedroom) but it was really hard to get Declan back to sleep each time, and each time we did get him back down, it's hard going back to sleep knowing that we'll be up again soon. Fortunately, Declan did almost 6.5 hours last night, I was up with him for about 40 minutes (fed him from one side, he woke up almost immediately, fed him from the other and he was down for the count), and then he slept for another 3 hours. An awesome night's sleep for everybody.

With Declan's feeding, we're trying to transition him to taking a formula bottle every now and then (maybe 2-3 times a week) so that I can have more freedom in getting out of the house without the boys. Last week at the beach we tried to give him his first bottle of formula and Declan freaked out... I was a little disheartened, but since he's taken a few breast milk bottles, I was hoping we'd be ok. Yesterday Declan took 1oz of formula, mixed with 2oz of breast milk and it worked! Today he had 2oz of formula with 3.5oz of breast milk. So hopefully we'll keep changing the ratio until he can take a full bottle of formula. I plan to keep breastfeeding until the 6-9 month range, but we'll play it by ear.

Overall, Declan is a very good baby - he's so smiley and he's even laughing now. He laughs in the bathtub or when we play with his arms and feet. He also talks a lot - much more than Jack did at this age - and he loves to make ooo-ing sounds and talk while he's sucking on his hands and fingers.

Jack... Oh Jack. The stage he's in right now just makes me laugh all the time. His vocabulary is extremely limited to:
daaaww (dog)
dat (cat)
ob (up)
dow (down)
BAAAAAAA (his response when you say the word sheep)
zhoozh (shoes)
jhoozh (juice)

The other night I sang him a song with the word "sheep" in it, and when I said it, Jack just said "BAAAAAAA" - he sounds like a machine gun because he's so loud and forceful. When I asked Jack in the car about sheep, he Baaaa's away. When I asked him what the cow says, he started to whine and cry. So I said "Sheep" and he started baaaa-ing again, happy as can be. Javier said he's a one trick pony.

Sort of. He also bounces up and down saying "ob, dow, ob, dow". He can now climb up onto the couch, and reach things on the dining room table. So yesterday he pulled down a pile of juice boxes, picked one, pulled off the straw and was about to open it, saying "jhoozh".

But mostly Jack just cracks me up because he's just so busy running all day long, stopping every now and then to pick something up off the floor and hand it to me or Javier saying "shhh" (share) - and he doesn't look in the direction he's running so he frequently falls and face plants. Since he's used to it, he usually just gets back up and continues to run without looking where he's going.

So both boys are great.

Milestones! 17 months and 3 months old.

Yesterday was the 23rd, which means the boys each hit another month milestone - Jack is now 17 months and Declan is 3 months old. We didn't do much to commemorate the "birthday" but we had a full day nonetheless. I was jolted out of bed by the doorbell at 7:45 (I was lying in bed with a sleeping Declan listening to Jack chat in his crib) - the insulators for the basement had arrived (side note: the basement refinishing is coming along nicely - so exciting - I'll have to post before and after pictures.)

The boys and I ran around in the morning - first, the dry cleaners, where I parked the car at the delivery entrance so I could quickly unload the boys and the laundry, and the owner of the place loves Jack so she comes out to carry him, then the grocery store, where Jack goes in the cart and Declan in the Baby Bjorn. Sometimes I think I get looks from others in the store that aren't quite pity... more like "Is she insane?" but maybe that's just me projecting. Anyhoo... after a stop at the house we were back in the car heading to Crate and Barrel so we could pick up the new chair and ottoman for the back porch - hooray! After about 3 minutes of crying in the car, Declan fell asleep and Jack told me to "Shhhhh", which I love. Jack has also started to copy me when I shhh Declan when he's crying and I have to say it's the cutest thing. I've seen Jack rock Declan in his carseat and say "shhh. shhh. shhh." just like I do when I'm trying to settle him. Again: love it.

Yesterday afternoon after lunch and naps, we headed to playgroup at Gail's house. Jack's been playing with these kids since he was 7 months old and met them at the My Gym class. Well, more like I've been hanging out with these moms (who have since become my good friends) since Jack was 7 months old, but now the kids are starting to take notice of each other and interact, even if they don't exactly "play" together. It involves a lot of toy stealing (Jack's not a big stealer - yet - and when someone takes his toy, he's usually like "whatever" or just confused). Jack also knows that share means to give what he's using to someone else, and he's pretty compliant. He says "ssssss" for share. He'll hand me an object and say "ssssss." Both boys were great at playgroup - once he woke up from his nap, Declan was his usual chill self, just hanging out on my lap (and then other laps as he was passed around) and smiling at people who would talk to him. I call him "smilely guyily" because he's pretty much always smiling. And Jack's a big independent player, which means he's not causing too much trouble. I received the highest of compliments from the girls yesterday as they asked me what I did to deserve two such wonderful boys. Yay!

As for sleep (which is what I'll be dying to remember as I re-read these posts with potential future children) - Jack is a rockstar (knock on wood) and Declan's still learning. On the optimistic side, Declan no longer has inconsolable crying spells in the evening. I don't know if he ever had full-blown colic, but he would cry inconsolably at times, which was the worst. He takes a catnap in the evening, then plays around, gets a bath, and goes to bed, either with a feeding or with walking and rocking. Last night I nursed Declan to sleep around 9:40, and he slept until 1:20 (3 hrs, 40 min), then he was up at 3:30, somewhere around 5 (when I brought him into bed with us because I figured he needed to stretch out - he's kind of cramped in the moses basket these days) up at 6:30, and I rocked him down around 7am (I knew he was still tired because he was crying and trying to fall asleep), so now it's 7:50am and he's sleeping on the couch and Jack's playing in his crib - which he's been doing since about 7:10. But he's starting to get fussy and I"ll have to get him soon. Tomorrow we get Declan's crib which I think will be another huge step forward for us in the sleep department because I won't worry about him being cramped, and also he'll be in another room so I probably won't intervene as much as I do when he's in our room. I used to just really want Declan to reliably fall asleep at 7:30 every night, but now I'd take the 10pm bedtime (late for me!) if I knew he'd go 6 hours. But like I said, we're making progress and I'm optimistic that we'll have long stretches soon.

I'm off to get Jack in a minute, but I have to record a few things/milestones for the boys: Jack has been crawling up on the coffee table now for a few weeks (a major no no and he knows it) but now he can crawl up onto the couch. His favorite things are animals and he says "doh" for dog and "dat" for cat. He's extremely "busy" and always needs to be doing something, opening and emptying drawers, or moving items from one container to another. He's so busy busy busy, just like his daddy. Declan is almost rolling over, but not quite. He's a big "scoocher" - I'll leave for a minute and he's somehow turned himself 90 degrees. He loves his activity mat and is starting to reach for things - he loves the rattle and the sounds it makes.

OK, Declan's stirring now as well, so we're off to start our day.

Taking Stock...

Declan is almost three months and for all of this time, I've been wondering what was happening with Jack at the corresponding ages and times. How many times a day did he eat? When did he start to go down at a regular time? When does the crying in the car stop? Everything. And I realize now that if I don't start recording this, I'll be asking these questions for the next 18 years. I figure at the very least we'll have a record of what we've done with all this time (which may help me remember these stay-at-home years that everyone tells me to treasure and that will fly by) but I'm really hoping that I'll also have milestones to refer to as the kids grow so I know what the heck is going on when others follow. Poor Jack will just have to be that typical first child whom we "learn" with.

So here's where we stand - today was a fairly typical Sunday:

Jack woke up around 7:30ish, after sleeping through the night - he's been a great sleeper now for as long as I can remember (which is to say since he's been about 6 months old), and I just pray this sticks. Declan had one of his best sleep nights, going down around10:30pm and sleeping until 5:15am or so. This is a record. I fed him at 5:15, brought him into bed with me, and fed him a little again at 7:30am. At 9am Declan woke up and coughed and threw up on me. Argh. Not my favorite way to start the day, but we did give him a bath which made him very happy, and when Declan's happy, he's VERY happy. It's the best.

Pancakes and yogurt for breakfast for Jack - he's now sitting in a booster seat instead of the high chair, and is interested in utensils, but has certainly not mastered them. He eats food by the fistful (no pincer grasp for this kid) - and I had to feed him the yogurt, if I gave it to him, it'd be all over the place.

11:30am we had a family outing to the Home Depot - I sat in the back with the boys because it helps keep Declan calm, else he's boo-hooing like crazy. He just wants the company and the human interaction... so since I can, why not? In the store, Javier takes Declan in the Baby Bjorn and I push Jack in the cart - it's a good system. Jack is so good riding in the cart, which makes my life so much easier. Especially when it's just me and the boys and I've got Dec in the Bjorn. Home at 12:30 - chicken nuggets, spinach pancake for lunch - and nap time for Jack. This is the best thing ever: tell him it's night night time, bring him upstairs, fresh diaper, sit in the chair and sing "Tender Shepard" while Jack plays peekaboo with the curtains, sing "Our Father", walk to the crib, hand Jack his lovie, place him down with his blankie, and Jack rolls around, gets comfy and smiles. I walk out of the room saying "night night", "I love you" and "I'll see you in a few hours" - Jack watches me leave, happy as can be, plays in his crib and falls asleep. It's the best thing ever, and I'm wracking my brain, trying to figure out how we can ensure it's the same with Declan.

But here's what I should have learned with Jack: I was so stressed out about getting him on a schedule and sleeping on his own, and it happened (with work and consistency on our part) in its own time. I probably made myself crazy with Jack for 10 months, stressing about this. I know I need to let Declan grow a bit more, mature a bit more, and that we'll get there. I just have to keep reminding myself that all of this takes time. It hasn't even been three months yet.

General things about Declan at "almost 12 weeks old": he still has no hair and no eyebrows. He will occasionally take a pacifier, but I'm not sure it's really worth it because he doesn't want it when he's upset, so what's the point of forming the attachment? I'm exclusively breastfeeding him, so I never know how much he gets. He had his 4th bottle (ever) today and took 3 oz, although I'm pretty sure he gets more when I breastfeed him (I have no idea why I think this...) He's a happy baby in general, but when he's sad, his whole face crumples and he bawls. He wakes up happy and for most of the day is independent, especially if fed, dry, and well-rested. If these conditions are met, he's happy on his mat or in the swing. The hardest part of the day with him is usually around dinner time, when he gets fussy - and this requires holding, bouncing and walking at the same time. Javier and I took turns eating and walking with Declan. Then I fed him tonight at 8:30pm and then he cried and fussed for about 20 minutes afterwards, before falling asleep on me. I held him for about 45 minutes before transferring him to his basket. (Crib not in, we're getting desperate.)

Jack went to bed early - after having pasta, turkey meatballs and tomato sauce for dinner, he rubbed his sauce-covered hands all over his head, which was funny because it then stuck out in all different directions. Then he smoothed down his hair and it was slicked to his head with sauce. Jav brought Jack up for his bath at 6:50pm, and although we were willing to have Jack stay up later, he wanted to go to bed. He was in his crib by 7:15 and down by 7:30. We have the camera to watch what's going on and it's the coolest thing. I watched Jack play with a book and then crawl into a comfortable position and fall asleep.

It's 10:40pm, all the Vargas men/boys are sleeping, and I should be too. Fingers crossed, Declan will sleep for awhile and I can get in a good chunk of sleep.